As you can tell from the masterful ad, I've decided to get involved with charity work! A little important information:
A recent obesity epidemic has raced through the dragon population due to an increased intake of cakes, pies, and those delicious pre-packaged muffins. Usually dragons live on a nutritious diet of young maidens, lesser knights, and not-so-bright adventurers, all of which keep their daily caloric intake healthily low.
However, recently dragons have discovered the joy of baked goods, and the sugar has caused diabetes and of course, unwanted weight gain. So why does this matter?
When dragons become addicted to cake, they cannot raze countrysides, carry off maidens, or show up as the proper plot twist. At Damsels4Dragons we believe that is unacceptable.
With a small donation of any young blonde maiden or first-born child, we can improve the diets and daily lives of dragons everywhere! Call toll free today at 1-800-HELP4DRAGONS to donate today!!
P.S. Next week there will be a whole new charity !
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